Family

Living in a large family, I'm often asked if i enjoy having so many brothers and sisters. Well, "so many" to most people; I stopped noticing after Naomi (the fourth child). But I began thinking about the answer to this question recently, I guess with it being the "holiday season" and all. It wasn't a difficult one to answer.

Our family, like every family, often has our bad days. There are times when someone wakes up "on the wrong side of the bed" and it puts everyone on edge. We all have our buttons to be pushed and there's a whole lot more people to push them. With the eighth child on the way, it's easy to feel forgotten and taken for granted. Our house is also RARELY quite, which doesn't mix well with the headache science sometimes gives me. But despite all that, I would not trade my family, or my life for anything, because these things are not going to be what I remember when I'm older. What I'll remember is sitting around our crowded kitchen table, laughing until we cried at a meal. I'll remember the joys of living with kids; the unexpected humor of Asher dancing around the house singing "Look at my butt. Look at my butt," or seeing Callie asleep in her highchair. I'll remember and forever tease Naomi about the time she so confidently told us, "I'm not blonde, I can see everything. I can even see you!" I'll remember me and Josh skipping around a hospital room shouting "It's a girl! It's a girl!" on the day Grace was born. I'll cherish Rose's prayers asking God to help her to be good, kind, and honest, and I may not know what kind of laughter Esther Sofia will bring to our lives, but what I do know is this: I am so thankful for her and all the challenges she has brought into our lives. I've taken on a huge amount of responsibility this last week or two, but I am so thankful for that, because now I have a much greater appreciation for all that my mom does for us, and I know that God is using this as training for me, for something, I may not know what, but first there are many more priceless memories ahead for my family. I love you Mom, Dad, Josh, Grace, Naomi, Rose, Asher, Callie, and Esther!

The One

The One

To the One who gives the wind its breath,

And gives the trees their voice.

To the Giver of Life, I hear their song,

And with them, I rejoice.

To the One who gives the sun its heat,

And placed the stars above.

To the Giver of Light, I see their glow,

And with them, I will love.

To the One who gives the thunder power,

And gives the lightning might.

To the Giver of Courage, I hear their strength,

And with them, I will fight.

To the One who gives the ocean waves,

And stretches out the sea.

To the Giver of Gifts, I see their peace,

And with them, I will seek.

To the One who gives the land its beauty,

And gives the world its color.

To the Giver of Love, and Light, and Life,

We'll proclaim your name forever.

"I have set my bow in the clouds and it shall be a sign of the covenant between me and the earth."

Last Friday my Dad, Josh, and I went to Kings Dominion. This month they're doing "Haunt Fest", for Halloween I guess. The day we were there they were doing a special thing where everyone was supposed to dress like a vampire and they got in for $20. We didn't do it because we have season passes, but I was a little worried. I just wasn't sure what to expect, and wasn't sure I really wanted to be around so many people who do things like that. I don't really know why I was so worried, but I was. As we were waiting in line, there was a rainbow. I remember being taught as I was growing up that God gave us the rainbow to remind us of his promise to never again flood the entire earth, but that's not exactly true. God said in Genesis 9:16, "When the bow is in the clouds I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth." Now I'm sure God didn't really need a reminder, but he seems to have one none the less. When I saw the rainbow, I couldn't help but think of Him and what he must think of the attempt to have the most vampires in one place at Kings Dominion. Behind me I heard some one say, "Look, a rainbow! I wonder what it means?" How evil must this world be for God to remind himself of his covenant with us; I wonder if that night I was being in the world, or of the world?

Wounded

I've learned a lot from my friends. I've heard a lot of different stories. Through their lives, and all that has happened to them that they've told me about, they've really helped me remember how blessed I am. Through them, I've realized that not everyone has life as easy as I do. This poem was inspired by just some of the stories I've heard. This is for you Nick!

Wounded

No one sees the tears that fall,

Or hears the desperate cries they call,

All they long for is to be loved,

But all their life, they've just been shoved.

With wounds inflicted by them self,

And wounds inflicted by everyone else,

All these wounds they need to be healed,

But that can't happen untill truth is revealed.

When Love finally comes, they can't let it in,

For fear that they'll be injured again,

The cuts, the bruises, the brokeness, they mask,

Untill seeing the pain is an impossible task.

But there's one who sees, and knows, and cares

There's one who seeks to meet you there,

When you're alone and your hope is gone,

Find hope in Him, He can carry you on.

Distractions

Though at times I get distracted,

Lose sight of what is true,

I hold on to what matters,

I turn my eyes to you.

I think of you my Savior,

And there's nothing left to say,

There's nothing else that matters,

All else just fades away.

So eliminate my fears,

My worries, and my sin,

Fill the empty space,

With your presance once again.

Remove from my mind,

All that is of me,

Replace it with a love,

And passion for my King

Here's another poem. I wrote this one day, and Philippians 1:21 ("For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain") happened to be suck in my head all that week. So..enjoy! =)

Philippians 1:21

"For to me to live is Christ and to die is gain"

When I trust in you I'm not afraid

Nothing here on earth can harm me

I must live for you with eyes on eternity

The whole earth trembles at the sound of your voice

In your stillness you can silence the noise

I'll follow your will with nothing to fear

Because all the darkness is afraid when you're near

A New Poem

I don't have a title yet..and I may end up changing it some later..but..here's a poem I've written recently-ish:

There's beauty in your flawless plans

I place my life into your hands

Though I'm forgetfull and sometimes fight

If I surrender it'll turn out right

Help me to follow without question or doubt

I want you to be what my life is about

Allow my love for you to show

And everyone to see it grow

I want my life to be a light

Help me to choose to do what's right